Where the Wild Things Are? In my head...

She seems to be in hiding but my intiution tells me that she knows I'll find her somehow. It's been more than a year since we last talked and I can tell that she's happy from her notes and blog posts. Looking back, I know that we could have saved our friendship if not for our pride or our dramas back then. I was depressed and she was hiding her pain. I was openly hurting and she was pretending to be ok. I felt I had more right to let go of the friendship that lasted for more than a decade because I felt more neglected. I was alone and I was at my lowest point. I needed understanding. But false judgement was what I got instead. She was happy (or maybe pretending that she is). She got reunited to her old flame (which I disapproved of eventually). I only got myself and her, my bestfriend.

I saved myself from having regrets and learned to let go. She wasn't the first one that I had to let go that year. I've learned that people change. Some will go and believe it or not they will be replaced. Some will choose to stay despite the changes and that's where compromise play its part. Some will keep coming back, so, you don't have to invest too much emotion on them. In a nutshell, relationships vary and you have to be flexible. You've got to have an open mind to understand all these to navigate through life. We live with people and we'll keep on inteacting with people up to our very last breath.

So, her life will go on and so does my life. We're both happy and contended with the way things are. I still think about her once in a while and I stalk her blogsite to know how she is. My pride has created a very thick wall between us. It always remind me of the last words I've told her. I've hold it true in my heart and I know there's no longer room for reconciliation. But I still miss her and I know that the memories I had with her will never be forgotten. She's like a ghost, constantly lingering in the places we've been to together. She's my favorite memory from the past and I think no one will ever replace her throne. She was my bestfriend and I will never look for another now that I know I can love myself more than any friend can. I'm contented with that. I am my own bestfriend.