Perhaps, you may have asked yourself, "What happened to her? She seemed OK to me. Why do they dislike her?" Well, in fact, I asked myself the same question. The moment I heard all the negative comments, I felt misunderstood. Then after the long and painful process of mulling over what I might have done and how they might have reacted to my actions, I eventually came to ask myself "What's wrong with me? Why did they side with my hater? Because sir, I have one. But we will go to that later." Then I was enlightened.
Work wise, I can say that I was OK. In fact, if there was a hidden camera somewhere in the office, I'm sure you might have said the same. But the problem was my inability to adjust to environment that I was in. After much thinking, I realized that the people inside the office are very vocal. They complain when they had to. They say exactly what they want to say, although they sometimes do it indirectly. I, however, remained quiet as ever. But my face doesn't hide anything. It's transparent as water. And that was a bad combination. It jeopardized my career. I owed my colleagues my explanation for the times I frowned after they've said or done something that I disapproved of. For instance, during those times that I went back to the office longer than I was supposed to be out for an errand, I should have explained to them that I was asked to wait that's why I came back late. They may not have asked for an explanation, but they deserved to hear one. I also owed myself an apology because I didn't make any attempt to clear my name. There was even one instance when I was reprimanded by an uber senior for doing a task for so long. I should have told her that after she left, one phone call after another came and I catered all even those phone calls at the other line. When she came back, that was only the time that I started doing the task I was supposed to do.
Lastly, the issue with my hater. I kept asking myself then why she was always angry at everyone especially towards me. Then I came to this conclusion. She's fire, I'm ice. While she's very vocal with her angst, I remain a mystery to her. She can see that I disapprove of the way she has treated me and the way that she's treating the others, but not knowing what I have to say or my opinion angers her all the more. She's been very unprofessional towards me. She didn't leave me any endorsement four times and once when I confronted her about one task that she neglected and passed on to me, she merely said that neglecting that task is really done on all juniors. That for me was unprofessional. I hold her responsible for spreading rumors about me. At least two of my colleagues have told me that she was saying things behind my back and I once overheard her. The story was changed slightly to make me appear bad. Perhaps, it's one of the reasons why some sided with her. Because she was the one talking. I did nothing to defend myself.
And before I go, I'd like to say that it's good that we only talked now. All the weeks of waiting had lead me to see things in a more objective light. Had we talked right away, I might have only said emotional reasons. And that won't do me any good. I do understand also that you were just in fear that I might also do what the one that preceded me did. That's why you didn't talk to me right away. So, I just have to let you know that there's two things in myself that I'm proud of, it would be my professionalism and my integrity. I put a high premium on those two qualities because I see those qualities as pillars to being a good worker.
